What Is Your Erotic Blueprint And How Can It Help You?

When it comes to talking about what turns us on, the language of love can sometimes be elusive. We might have no problem discussing other aspects of our personality, but discussing our sexual desires with a partner can be challenging. 

This is where Erotic Blueprints can give you the perfect toolkit to talk about what you want in bed, and also to understand your partner’s needs better as well. 

The concept was first identified by Jaiya Ma, a sexologist who works with couples to help them improve their love lives. The theory is straightforward: we all fit into one of the five Erotic Blueprints, much as we all broadly fit into different personality types. The five types include:

Energetic—This type enjoys the build up and anticipation of sex as much as the actual event. To get the most of sexual experiences, they need to focus on foreplay using props such as massage oils and sex toys. 

Sensual—This type of lover thrives in the right surroundings, with ambient lighting, temperature, scented candles, their favourite music, and so on. They also love playing around with different textures on the skin and using the power of touch to heighten their erotic pleasure.

Sexual—This is the most straightforward type of sexual personality. They enjoy seeing and exploring their partner's body and don’t like to linger too long on foreplay. 

Kinky—Kinky types are turned on by the allure of the forbidden fruit, and enjoy playing around with power roles during sex. Their idea of foreplay might involve a bondage kit.

Shapeshifter—A sexual shapeshifter identifies to some extent with all of the four of the sexual personality types described above. They tend to be open minded and creative, but this can be at the expense of knowing what they really want from themselves or a partner. 

How do you work out your Erotic Blueprint?

Some people naturally know what turns them on and what doesn’t, and they aren't afraid to express their desires at any stage in a relationship. However, talking about sex openly is not something that feels natural to everyone, especially if they are from a culture or social background where they were made to feel ashamed of their sexuality. 

If you have the feeling that your sexual experiences are not truly bringing you the erotic pleasure and satisfaction that you desire and deserve, then take a step back and try to figure out why. Are you too happy to meet your partner’s needs while paying too little attention to your own for example?

There is no need to have a partner with exactly the same Erotic Blueprint as your own to be happy; in fact being different can make your sex life richer and create more trust and intimacy between you. However, the first step toward this goal is being honest about your own desires.

Experiment with different sexual techniques and props, whether that’s getting dressed up in a feather boa and high heels, or rubbing ice cubes over your partner’s body. Take your time and enjoy the learning curve towards an even better sex life!