The Truth Behind The Worst Sex Advice Out There

There are so few universals when it comes to pleasure. Everyone has different turn-ons, different kinks, different sex toys they are used to and different comfort zones.

Ultimately, as long as you are being safe, being consensual and feeling great in the process, the odds are pretty good that you are probably having some pretty good sex, and exploration and communication with any sexual partners will help with most of the rest.

The problem with sex being so intimate and personal is that there are not too many universal rules or pieces of advice that will work for everyone. What works for one person or one couple might not work for someone else.

That hasn’t stopped people of course; so many people will give sex advice to others, sometimes with the best of intentions but sometimes not. However, whilst some advice is just about general enough to work, other sex advice is absolutely ridiculous, and here are the facts behind some of the worst of it.

This is obviously not about how to use certain toys, how to put on a condom or a dental dam, or making sure you are doing it in a way that won’t hurt each other.

Sex Isn’t Supposed To Hurt

If you want it to, pain and sex can very commonly interlink, and if you and your partner are fine with that, have clear boundaries and a safe word, then, by all means, get a whip or a paddle out.

But with that said, penetrative sex is not supposed to hurt, and if you are feeling sharp pain when trying to insert a toy, a fist or a penis vaginally or anally, that’s a sign to stop, or at least to slow down.

Take anything at your own pace, it is perfectly fine to say no or stop if it does not feel right, and always have some lube around if you need it, although do remember that oil-based lubes might cause condoms to break.

Pool Sex And Shower Sex Isn’t Wetter Sex

A lot of people fantasise about having a steamy hot shower before their partner comes in and makes it even steamier, water mixing with all sorts of other fluids to create a hot wet, saucy mess.

Shower sex can be fun, as can pool sex or bath sex, but the idea that the wetness soaking into your skin will make everything smoother and slicker is actually the opposite of the truth.

Many lubricants, both natural and artificial, are washed away by lube, so the result is often a bit rough and painful, usually one person’s going to be cold and showers themselves tend to be a bit too tight to be comfortable.

With that said, you can still have foreplay and teasing in the shower, but wait until you get out before you go any further.

If In Doubt, Do Not Get Drunk

Perhaps the worst advice that may have ever been given to people looking to spice up their sex life is to get drunk.

There are obvious risks alcohol poses regardless of anything else, but drinking is not exactly a sexual lubricant, even if it can feel that way.

Aside from riskiness and increased horniness, it can make it harder for people with vaginas to orgasm, can cause so-called “whisky dick” in people with penises which makes it harder for them to ejaculate, and generally can lead to a bit of a lacklustre time if both of you have had too much.